Original article from: Burnout and God’s Invitation to Rest
I once heard a venture capitalist talk about how you can train the
human body to operate on only four hours of sleep per night. He was
describing the type of dedication and work ethic he expects of the
entrepreneurs he invests in. He wasn’t the only one I know who
advocated for this. My first boss out of college also had a wonky
relationship with rest. He put in a ridiculous number of hours. Once,
I made a comment to him about how much he worked and he responded,
“You can sleep when you’re dead.”
We could call these guys crazy and extreme, but how many of us always
describe ourselves as “busy”? How many of us feel hurried? How many of
us depend on caffeine to wake up to our existence and
responsibilities? How many of us never feel like we have enough time
for all the things we need to do? How many of us struggle to remember
what we enjoy doing? Please, tell me it’s not just me!
In contrast, how many of us would describe our lives as rested and
restful? When was the last time you bragged about taking a nap or
getting a full night’s sleep? Do you regularly find yourself with lots
of extra time on your hands? No? Me either!
Ruth Haley Barton, an expert and author on spiritual formation
practices, describes the difference between “good tired” and
“dangerously tired.” Good tired is when we put in a good day’s work,
go home to relax and recover, and then come back rested and ready for
the new day. Good tired manages a healthy cycle of work to rest and
recovery, and back to work again. Good tired is how we were designed
to live as God’s creatures.
Dangerously tired is when we put in longer hours than normal for too
long of a period. Dangerously tired is when we never seem to get
enough sleep to recover. It’s when we sprint from one project to
another, to another, and never get the recovery time we need to both
celebrate the completion of a project and rest up for the next one.
According to Ruth, symptoms of dangerously tired include:
The first time I heard Ruth describe these symptoms, I was at a
spiritual retreat she was leading. I was there because I felt
completely burned out on life. I’d been working hard at a job that
asked for me to carry a heavier workload during Covid, and I’d been
co-pastoring a church plant. Not to mention, I was also a husband and
a dad. What made each of these responsibilities so much harder is that
I hadn’t yet realized I had an addiction to helping people and saying
“yes” to anyone and everyone.
As a result, I was overwhelmed, tired, anxious, and ready to quit on
just about everything. I’d sometimes fantasize about doing something
at work or at church that made them have to fire me. At night, my
dreams fluctuated between moments of intense anger or dreams of having
panic attacks. All of those circumstances led me to my first retreat
with Ruth. On the first night of the retreat, as she listed the
symptoms of dangerously tired, I wrote down every one with a nod and a
painful realization in my gut. She gave me words for the absolute
exhaustion and desperation I felt. I really was dangerously tired, and
over time, I’ve discovered that quite a few of us limp through our
lives this way.
This isn’t what God desires for us.
In Psalm 127:1-2, the Psalmist writes: “Unless the Lord builds the
house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord guards the
city, the guard keeps watch in vain. It is in vain that you rise up
early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he
gives sleep to his beloved.”
The Psalmist describes two pretty stressful parts of life we can all
relate to in different ways. First, building a house. While most of us
have never built a house, we can probably relate to the stress of
finding a place to live and then taking care of it. Things break.
They’re expensive to fix. Roommates are always more complicated than
we think they’ll be before we move in. Rent is expensive and comes due
every month. How the heck did the electricity bill end up that high?
Those moments when you set a trash bag outside on the porch because it
smells bad, forget about it, and then get fined by the rental company
because it sat out there all night. Homeownership or renting is
stressful.
And then guarding a city. Perhaps you haven’t been commissioned to
stand guard at the city gate all night hoping, that of all nights,
tonight is not the one when your enemies attack in the dark. But
perhaps you’ve experienced fear before. Perhaps there have been times
life has felt outside of your control. Maybe there’s been a time or
two when you’ve been up all night because of a stressful situation: a
hard conversation at work, an upcoming test, a scary diagnosis, or a
bad breakup. Perhaps there’s something that resonates with you in
thinking about staring out into the darkness, wondering if something
bad is about to happen.
In both situations, the Psalmist begins with the phrase, “unless the
Lord.” These verses aren’t implying we sit back and don’t do anything.
The phrase “unless the Lord” doesn’t say, “Put your feet up and let
the Lord build your house.” If you do that? The building supplies will
never become a house. Instead, the Psalmist invites us to trust in God
and depend on him, as we do the work he has for us to do. He doesn’t
want us to “eat the bread of anxious toil,” meaning running around in
busied hurriedness to try to make everything happen on our own. He
wants us to trust God and pursue the rest and recovery he offers. The
word for “sleep” could also be translated “rest,” and the phrase “he
gives sleep to his beloved” could be translated, “he provides for his
beloved during sleep (or rest).” In other words, taking time to rest
and recover is an act of trust in God. It’s acknowledging we did the
best we could with the limitations God gave us, and we’re leaving the
results up to him.
And this isn’t the only place in the Bible that talks about rest as
God’s gift. In the beginning, when God created the heavens and the
earth, he rested from all his work on the Sabbath day and invited his
people to do the same. Better yet, he commanded them to rest. This
idea of sabbath is a restful celebration of the co-laboring of God
with his people. It recognized that men and women and God had worked
together all week and were able to start a new week by pausing to
celebrate what was accomplished with feasting and rest. It was
countercultural then, just as much as this idea is countercultural
now. And it also has a beautiful implication for what God means when
he commands something—it’s an invitation into a richer and fuller
life. Jesus also invited us to rest when he said, “Come to me, all you
that are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke
upon you and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and
you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden
is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).
Friends, this is the heart of God for us: to find rest. If you and I
are feeling overly burdened or worn out, maybe we should pause and ask
God to help us see if we’ve taken on too much.
Finally, God created us with limits that include sleeping, eating,
drinking, and pooping. Think about how much time those activities take
in our lives. God could’ve made us to be recharged by the sun or by
the friction of walking, but he gave us tasty food as a gift instead.
Food that requires preparation and then time to consume it. He also
designed us to need eight to nine hours of sleep (maybe more,
depending on who you read) every day. The Psalmist and Jesus both
suggest that rest is God’s gift to us.
Limits are a gift from God because he is worthy of restful trust. In
fact, that’s really what rest is: trust. Trust that while we’re
sleeping, God can still provide for us. Trust that by resting on the
Sabbath, God will help accomplish the work we need to get done during
the remaining 5-6 days. Trust that listening to the needs of our
bodies honors God as we care for this temple of the Holy Spirit he’s
given us and in which God dwells.
One super important caution about the idea of sleep being a gift from
God: I don’t think the Psalmist is implying that people who struggle
with insomnia—or who can’t get enough sleep because of
responsibilities or children—aren’t loved by God, or that they’re
living in distrust of him. And knowing what I know about Jesus, I
don’t think he’s judgmentally condemning anyone who finds themselves
overwhelmed with the burdens of life. First, if that’s you, I’m so
sorry. Life is so much harder when we can’t sleep and when we feel
overwhelmed. I know this doesn’t fix it, but the primary idea isn’t
about sleep. The point is that restful trust is an invitation God has
for all of us. Even someone who literally can’t sleep can still accept
the invitation of this verse by restfully trusting in God with their
eyes open.
And one more caution, I started by describing being dangerously tired.
I wish I could say that I’ve fixed myself, and now I walk through life
restful and rested all the time. Some of the habits that got me to the
place of dangerously tired are still there. I still say “yes” too
much, and I still find myself having angry dreams at times. There are
seasons when my kids don’t sleep well, and I end up not getting enough
sleep. And not to mention, I practiced unhealthy rhythms of rest for
decades that got me to a place of burnout. 18 months of living
differently aren’t going to undo the past 18 years.
But I’m on the journey toward trusting God with my limitations and
following his invitation to rest. My biggest win so far? Scheduling
two chunks of time into every week to R.I.G. (Rest In God). What does
this look like? Usually, it means sleeping in, making a cup of coffee,
and then simply sitting in silence with God on a comfy chair, on the
deck, or near a body of water for at least an hour. The whole point of
this time is to trust that God loves me not for what I do or
accomplish, but simply because I’m his kid. And what do many parents
crave? Time with their kids. I figure God likes that too.
My second biggest win? I’m getting really good at noticing when I’m
saying “yes” too much again. I’ve memorized those symptoms of
dangerously tired, and I’ve added a few more that are helpful for me.
When I start getting cynical? I use my R.I.G. time to ask God to show
me where I’m trying to do too much. But again, I’m very much on a
journey and still learning what it looks like to trust God. And I hope
this feels like an invitation for you to join me in restful trust in a
God who is trustworthy.
So, if you decide to take a nap today? I approve! God gives rest to
his beloved. If you decide to go to bed early tonight? God is pleased
by that. And next time you fall asleep in church? Just remind the
pastor (and anyone else with a judgmental glance) that you’re just
being biblical and taking God at his word.
Originally published on reclaimtoday.org. Reclaim Today® is a part of
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